


Fist Fighting Death Himself

by Panda_LOVE_Panda



Series: Judging a Book By Its Cover is a Universal Thing Apparently [1]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alien Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Alien Dark Creativity | Remus “The Duke” Sanders, Alien Fugitives, Alternate Universe - Space, Bleeding Out, Escape, Exhaustion, Gen, He’s okay I promise, Human Morality | Patton Sanders, I mean it, Immortality is simply having too much spite to die change my mind, Its not an acceptable procedure, It’s fine tho, Kids do not try and insult someone into consciousness, Minor Violence, Minor choking of a character, Rated T because Remus, Space AU, Sympathetic Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Unconsciousness, Unorthodox and definitely inaccurate medical treatment, Will be okay, Wounds, life threatening injury, will be
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-10
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:41:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26922307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Panda_LOVE_Panda/pseuds/Panda_LOVE_Panda
Summary: It had been so long since they’d been out of cages, so suddenly having the vast vacuum of space at their fingertips was both exceptionally reassuring and daunting in equal measure.Where would they go next? How could Virgil and Remus keep their favourite little human puffball safe in a universe of smugglers still out to get them?But more importantly for the immediate future, how was Remus supposed to keep Virgil from turning corpse-y on his perfectly good escape pod floor?
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Morality | Patton Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders & Morality | Patton Sanders
Series: Judging a Book By Its Cover is a Universal Thing Apparently [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1964881
Comments: 5
Kudos: 34





	Fist Fighting Death Himself

**Author's Note:**

> Hello my lovelies! This is the first oneshot of my Space AU! 
> 
> It’s basically a bit of a preview for the series just to see how everyone likes it, so please don’t be afraid to tell me how you feel about it!

It had been nothing short of a relief to see the vast and suffocating vacuum of space laid bare before him.

Well…behind him.

Remus hadn’t actually looked out the front of the escape pod in nearly a twentieth of a rotation, spinning around in the swivelling chair until he faced his two new friends…Old friends?

They’d all had a very unconventional friendship thanks to those bastards. His other set of arms stretched behind him to hold the controls in a death grip at the thought of them.

  
Remus convinced himself instantly that he was just taking precautions and wasn’t, in fact, attempting to strangle inanimate objects in his fear and rage.

He was insane – sure – but he didn’t escape death just to leap into it at the very next chance.

Plus, he didn’t think Virgil would take too kindly to him abandoning the controls. He’d had the comms open for ages, waiting for anything – anyone who would help – to answer.

He’d given up after nothing but grey static met his efforts every single fucking time. Their pod had been on the fritz since they were shot at (the autopilot was practically dead by the third blast), so it was kind of understandable in all honesty.

It didn’t mean he had to like it.

Speaking of Virgil, the poor guy was barely holding his head up as he sprawled out on the floor, failing at staunching a steady stream of blood from his abdomen by tying what appeared to be the tattered remains of his shirt around it. As far as pressure on the wound went, it didn’t come even close to helpful by the looks of things.

Patton was curled up against his other side, having passed out from exhaustion the moment he had collapsed to the ground.

If the man weren’t human, he’d be worried about his continued unconsciousness. As it were though, he assumed the puffball would pull through with his freakish tolerance for both pain and...pretty much everything anyone could throw at him.

Humans would be great at getting freaky, no doubt. He cackled silently in his head at the thought.

His musings were rudely and abruptly brought to a halt in the next moment by a groan of pain.

_‘Hoo boy,’_ the crazy man whistled, narrowing in on Virgil once more. _‘Are you going to bleed out? I bet you’re going to bleed out.’_

Virgil looked barely cognizant, his eyes glazed over in a way that unnerved even Remus himself. He didn’t even try to lift his head anymore, slumping down like a broken toy.

Shit.

The little fucker was actually going to die.

He had to do something.

Think.

Call to the gods, he had no experience with keeping things _alive_!

What would JanJan do? He was great at helping people!

Remus crossed his upper arms, sneering down at the man in a way that made him want to skewer his own skull with the point of his tail.

  
He barely actually knew the guy, but being a horrible fucker when he was in this state? This might be the worst thing he’s ever done.

But he could only think of one way to keep him alive.

Deep breath.

Just like Janny.

_‘You won’t last the flight. I’ve seen fucking Gorbons stronger than you,’_ he goaded.

Virgil groaned weakly, but barely even twitched a hand.

Okay, this needs more of a push.

Personal.

Below the belt.

Remus’ eyes lit up momentarily, before he grinned.

_‘You’re just gonna die there? Right next to Patton?’_ Virgil’s entire hand twitched at the mention of their human friend.

Gotcha.

_‘You gonna die holding his hand? Let him wake up to a corpse? He’ll cry. You’d leave him all alone? All alone with a virtual stranger? What kind of friend are you, VeeVee? You don’t sound like a good one to me!’_

Remus had been leaning closer and closer in the small pod, stopping only when his lower arms were stretched out fully on the controls.  
There was a snarl from the bleeding man on the floor.

Virgil shot up in the blink of an eye, gripping Remus by the throat.

“How,” he growled out in the darkest voice Remus had ever heard from anyone’s mouth. Impressive – “dare you.”

The man in black looked ready to squeeze every bit of breath from the madman’s throat, fingers flexing against the hollow whistle bones in his neck.

  
If Remus were any other person, he’d be terrified.

Unfortunately for the very angry Virgil, he wasn’t one to fear a good _roughing up_.

Remus winked at the man even as he choked, causing him to startle and loosen his hold.

Finally able to breathe and talk again, Remus whistled out excitedly.

_‘VeeVee! You did it!’_ He couldn’t stop from flapping his hands in joy.

Virgil’s brow was furrowed as he slowly pieced together what happened.

“Did you just…goad me into staying alive?” The man in black stared at Remus as if seeing him for the first time.

_‘Technically,’_ Remus whistled, _‘you used spite to stay conscious! Now you can keep pressure on that wound and you can also keep doing the not dying thing until we land and find a medical centre!’_

Wow, Janus hadn’t been lying when he said that a person’s stubborn streak allowed them to fight gods bare-handed.

Nice.

Virgil breathed slowly and deeply, obviously trying to keep his vision clear after getting up so fast.

Guess he’d been too angry to notice before.

Now, he fell into the other chair beside Remus, holding his hand tightly to his wound. The pressure was doing it the world of good since he hadn’t the strength to put pressure on it before.

It looked like it was going to be okay, at least on the ‘angry fellow escapee not becoming a corpse on the floor’ front.

_‘So,’_ Virgil began awkwardly, valiantly pretending to not have just tried to kill Remus (thank the elder gods. No one should apologise for attempted murder if it’s between friends, in his humble opinion), switching back to mimicking Remus’ whistle language.

 _‘What now?’_ He gazed back at the still sleeping Patton on the floor, his eyes softening at the human’s relaxed face.

Poor thing.

It was rather amazing how he could sleep through that whole…thing. Remus wished he could pass out that completely.

_‘Now we go and steal a proper ship and run like a rabid bandalooni is snapping at our heels!’_

Virgil relaxed at Remus’ chipper tone, leaning further back into the chair.

‘ _No_ ,’ said Virgil uncomfortably. _‘I mean…where do we go? Where do we hide? How do we-‘_

Virgil didn’t need to say anymore. A human this far from Earth would stick out like a stiff dick. They were practically waving a flag between their butt cheeks, screaming ‘there’s a reward out for our heads by the richest of the lowlifes!’

But there was no way in hell they were splitting from their little puffball.

The grey fuzzy static cleared from the comms unit momentarily.

Neither Remus nor Virgil were facing the right way to see the coloured blur waving desperately at the back of their heads.

The audio was non-existent and the visuals were barely even breaking through onto the fritzy screen. It’s a wonder that it came through at all.

Where could three wildly different looking fugitives hide?

The static started to cling to the blurry figure again, as if unwilling to let it catch the fugitives’ eyes.

Where could the three of them blend in?

Remus made a tune by blowing air through one of the whistle bones and periodically tapping at it as he thought.

Like storm clouds blotting out the sun, the comms began to fizzle back to grey once more.

Wait a moment…

  
Why blend in?

Remus sat bolt upright, a manic grin nearly splitting his face in half.

Virgil understandably leaned away from the man.

The screen was completely dead for good this time as Remus excitedly twirled to face the controls, setting in coordinates.

  
  


He threw a smirk behind him to Virgil.

_‘I think I know just the place!’_

**Author's Note:**

> There you have it, folks! Hope you liked it! 
> 
> I personally am a HUGE fan of Space AUs in this fandom, so if you haven’t checked any out, I can’t recommend them enough!


End file.
